I didn't feel like twenty-nine was old until I woke up this morning. Now I feel really tired. Ridiculously tired. Birthdays are so weird. You look forward to them - party, cake, presents, the idea that you're the center of attention for one day a year - and then when they're finally over, this terrible feeling of unease sets in. What is the point of a birthday? I'm not sure exactly what we're celebrating. All of the real milestones have already passed long ago, unless we want to count that I'm one year closer to dying.

Also, that was a rhetorical quetion.

I Feel:: hmm.
Music of the Moment:: hhhhhh

I wonder why people like to eat vegetables.

I Feel:: hmm.
Music of the Moment:: belle/sebastian/whatever

Why the hell did I say I would bake a pie for Thanksgiving? This is going to end tragically with me burning down my house. I'm going to be HOMELESS.

I Feel:: huzzah
Music of the Moment:: clash it out

Very little pun intended, I assure you.

I wrote a twenty page research article on Romero's sociopolitical commentary within the "dead" genre this week (specifically Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead, and Land of the Dead - with strong metaphorical emphasis on race, feminine repression, militia-based structures, and mass multi-market consumerism), and now I can't stop thinking/writing/dreaming about zombies. This can't be normal. I'm becoming obsessed in an unhealthy way. I'm incorporating it into all of my other writing. I'd feel more worried about it, but there are all kinds of eggheads who are apparently just as obsessive as me.

Case in point - one of the coolest articles I've ever read in my entire life: The Zombie Attack on the Computational Conception of Mind by Selmer Bringsjord. Please read the following excerpt and try to tell me it doesn't completely BLOW YOUR MIND.

"What are minds? What is thinking? What sets people apart, in all the known universe? Such questions have tantalized philosophers for millennia, but scant progress could be claimed until recently. For the current generation has seen a sudden and brilliant flowering in the philosophy/science of the mind; by now not only psychology but also a host of related disciplines are in the throes of a great intellectual revolution. And the epitome of the entire drama is Artificial Intelligence, the exciting new effort to make computers think. The fundamental goal of this research is not merely to mimic intelligence or produce some clever fake. Not at all. Al wants only the genuine article: machines with minds, in the full and literal sense. This is not science fiction, but real science, based on a theoretical conception as deep as it is daring: namely, we are, at root, computers ourselves" (Bringsjord 48)

This is fucking awesome. In essence, we can begin charting structural "undead" brain flow around the concept of artificial intelligence. In layman's terms: the zombies are real, people - and they're coming to eat your brains.

I Feel:: this guy right here.
Music of the Moment:: they're everywhere

... when people go around saying things like, "Man, I look like such a lesbian today."

Maybe it's because I'm gay, but it makes me want to punch a wall - or even someone's face. What the ever-loving fuck does that even mean? How does one "look like a lesbian"? I must be the worst dyke ever, because I don't go around dressed in a wifebeater and baggy jeans, sporting a crewcut. I wear pretty dresses, heels, and make-up. I have nearly waist-length hair. Does that make me any less sure of my sexuality? No, it does not.

Oh yes, for those of you who didn't already know it - I'm a lesbian. I guess this is my coming out post. Nice to meet you.

I Feel:: so fucking aggravated.
Music of the Moment:: die die die

Well, would you look at that! There's a giant fucking leak in the ceiling of the library. Maybe someone could have called the maintenance people about it over the weekend? You know, before it monsooned for three days in a row? Oh, I see. You were too busy. I totally understand. It's only books, right? Your time is too precious to spare.

Hey, I've got a great idea! How about the next time it rains, I light a bunch of candles all over the library - then we can see whether water or fire will destroy everything.

Idiots.

I Feel:: o hale naw
Music of the Moment:: fffff

I realized I haven't typed anything worthwhile on LJ in over a month (besides LULZY commentary on various communities, and it could be argued that those are certainly NOT worthwhile), so here I am. On your porch. Writing you a little love sonnet.

Real life has taken a backseat to the mysterious, time sucking powers of the internetz. I need to take a timeout or my brain is going to explode. I have to do a write up exploration of "Daisy Miller" by Thursday night, and I haven't even started yet. I mean, I've read it before - but there's something so different about reading to try and critically analyze something. I always feel like I'm dissecting an insect. I like it, but it's all very clinical and detached.

I've also decided I want to do grad school at Rollins for English. Hellooooo student loans, how I've missed you.

I Feel:: thoughtful, thinking.
Music of the Moment:: lolololol

Tickets to see Neko at the Plaza go on sale this saturday and I am freaking the fuck out. njiempw wdfk gui4rjeiopw

I Feel:: sweeeet
Music of the Moment:: Blacklisted, again

The library had a chili cookoff today, and the resulting smell is making me die inside. UGH, please stop. I need to soak everything around me in Febreeze.

I Feel:: disgusting.
Music of the Moment:: Neko Case Blackliste on flipping repeat for a week now

Twitter seems to be broken this morning, and I feel like a methhead denied her daily dose. I honestly think I would go prostitute myself for just a single @ reply... it's bad, dudes.

I Feel:: damn you
Music of the Moment:: ackack